Have you ever felt other people’s dreams flowing through your mind’s eye like leaves on a stream? All at the same time while you are doing something else? It’s actually pretty interesting. Unless one of them is having a nightmare.
This is something new for me and the others… feeling in sync with the world for the first time in life… kind of little combo of the present and a slight bit in the future. Prior to November 2013 we’ve always felt as if we were out of sync with the universe and it was not a very pleasant feeling. Always feeling “off”. It’s a horrible helpless feeling.
It’s stinks because if feels as if just in the past few weeks someone plopped me here in the body after creating me? Forming me? Getting me ready? idk. (No, I don’t wear a tinfoil hat to keep out the signals radio waves or whatever they use their tinfoil hats for. I just have DID.)
It stinks because I’m not sure about certain things, I have to learn a lot of stuff now. The good thing is that Marshall is known and loved by all of us in her. Especially me! I love that boy to death and am so proud of him with how he is handling our situation and how it is effecting me.
It makes me/us feel very fragile… together enough to just be here but toss in the least bit of a trigger… then there is a crack and we have to repair it… it sets us back a little. It can be as simple as not quite recognizing someone that someone inside knows you should remember. There are a lot of triggers and I’m not getting into that here. I’m still getting a handle on it myself and it’s rough. Shame on the some of us who tried to stuff it all away. Now like a volcano everything is erupting. With the support of my friends the eruption is manageable.
It’s like someone has given us all permission to simple BE. And that my friends is a good thing.