An “Ah Ha!” Moment

I realized something after writing my last post about being in between stages 4 & 5. This makes perfect sense to me but you may not think so. I hate to clean. I mean beyond hate. It’s worse than a chore and I won’t do it. I mean I keep things up but as far as things like vacuuming and dusting and the like… it’s like the vacuum and other cleaning tools are poison to me and if I touch them I’ll die. Yes, that is a bit over dramatic but you get my point right?

I figured out why cleaning has such a negative connotation for me. It’s because I never got to stay anyplace long enough during that homeless year and for 4 more years prior the threat of getting kicked out loomed heavy. Who wants to clean when the threat of getting kicked out is there? The kind of cleaning I am referring to is like a Saturday cleaning. (That’s when I used to go through the entire house cleaning.)

But, yeah. When I get that urge to clean I know I am inching closer and closer to Stage 5. That, my dears, is a good thing! I have been getting the urge to clean but really haven’t done anything about it lol. When I do? Oh man will I be one happy chica! When that happens… I will know I am “pulling my life back together.”

However, for now I am realizing that it has turned into where I think if I clean really good then we will get kicked out. See how my frizzy little brain turned that around?

Interesting. Very interesting. And now that I have realized it… let’s see how long it takes before the urge to clean completely overtakes me. lol

Reorganization and the beginning of positive emotions- Over time, the sadness stage will start to lessen, and you will begin to see a lightening of your emotions. You will start to perceive your life in a more positive light, although bouts of grief and sadness will persist.

The final phase of this model is to let go of your need for the loss and to move on with your life. Sadness will lessen greatly, and new interests will gradually occupy your thoughts more and more, crowding out the misery and desolation. The final stage is when you “pull your life back together”.

Until next time… Blessed Be… Missy