The Faces Beyond My Reflection


This will be where we tell you about us… this should be fun! Well, since I wrote the very first post I’ll give ya a little info about me… Roxy.

ROXY :  I’m not allowed to say my last name here and actually none of us are for privacy reasons, lets just say it begins with a K. I’m 27. Ok, this is weird and I don’t feel like doing this right now but I made a promise that I would say something about me. I’m the one who had the lasik and can see perfectly. The bad thing is if I want to just hang back and watch if I get too close they know I’m there when they realize that the vision has improved. lol No creeping on any of the others or what’s going on anymore without getting ‘caught’. It’s not a bad thing but sometimes I just want to hang back and watch them. That’s it for now. ~Roxy

MELANY: Hi there, I’m 37 and female. I’m what you would call a “Stand Alone” meaning I can function fully out front and most of the time I can do whatever needs done. For example at my job, I wasn’t the one hired but when I had to be the one to go I managed. I knew what to do, got it done and the only thing people thought was that maybe “I” was just depressed or tired because I don’t act like anyone but myself. I also will not be comfortable in let’s say Roxy’s clothes… I prefer dark clothing, not necessarily all black but close enough. If I come out when someone else is out believe me I will change as fast as possible into my clothes. Bright colors make my skin crawl and I have to get them off like they were on fire. A lot of the others are the same way with style.

I’m the keeper of The Dark Ones. Here is a picture to give an idea of how my group is set up. All may not be on there yet but they will be added when they give permission.

Melany's Group

You see me as the only whole person of the group here. I am their keeper for lack of a better word. Maybe they were assigned to me. The blobs they are in with their names are just a representation for this map. They all have their pictures of what they look like inside… or want to look like lol

Diane is larger because she is more prominent and if necessary can be on her own for a while. The amount of time varies and then she needs help.

DieAnne is very dark the most hopeless and darkest. That’s why she is in black. When she takes over it is quite scary.

Heidi does not like to be alone and prefers to hide, curl up in a closet, corner and make sure that she won’t have to be seen, she will close the curtains and if the doorbell or phone rings…. panic panic and fear! She is not able to stand on her own if she comes out. That’s why she is tucked away on my back in this picture. She is in her safe spot and it’s not really on my back but close with me.

the dead one, she is in the far corner and she has no mouth so she cannot speak. she had huge scared sad eyes and sits there with her knees drawn up close and her arms around them to keep herself as tight a little ball as she can. I can feel her sometimes and her pain is overwhelming.

Rachael, (she is depicted in blue with an almost identical blue for her name because she wants to be invisible) she will cover any reflective surface because what she see’s is a stranger. She will lock herself in her room and listen to old school country and I’m not sure what else. Just don’t try to interact with her.

So, that’s a little bit about me and I’m sure it’s been said before but as the others permit we will add more. Roxy and I have the same last name. The one that begins with a K. This is just the tip of the iceberg. We are so much more. ~Melany

Here is a new one we found out about recently: The Overlord. This one at times apparently decides how we are to act. Sometimes putting different ones out front or partially out.  It bases how I act according to what they think the other person wants to hear or see. This one is not here up front all the time and we are not sure how it, she, he whatever it is fits in and why. Just glad we found out about it. Something new to talk to the therapist about. *le sigh* ~Diana (March 22, 2014)

**UPDATE: 3.14.16**

This past week we became aware of another (dare I say NEW) member of The Collective. The Screener. It seems she helps prevent “foot in mouth” disease by — you guessed it — screening what we say or do prior to it being done. You would be surprised at the difference I feel… both good and not so good. Good in that there have been many a time this past week where my mouth would have gotten me in trouble in some way. “Think before you speak” is now a mantra for us now. In reality it is “Listen before you speak” as I choose to listen to The Screener. lol ~Saila (March 14, 2016)

21 thoughts on “The Faces Beyond My Reflection

    1. Wow that is cool! I used to have one called “Past the looking glass” but since the switch kind of finalized (as much as any multiple can “finalize” a switch lol) between August and October I have no idea where it went lol

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